Managing Anger in Grief: Healthy Ways to Cope

At the Austin Hatcher Foundation for Pediatric Cancer, we understand that the journey through grief is a complex and deeply personal experience. For families and individuals who have faced the challenges of pediatric cancer, emotions like anger can be particularly intense and difficult to navigate. We are committed to supporting our families through every stage of their journey, including providing resources and strategies for managing the emotional toll that often accompanies grief. Anger is a natural response to loss, and it’s essential to find healthy outlets for this powerful emotion. Below are practical strategies to help you express and cope with anger in a way that does not harm yourself or others.

1. Recognize When You Are Angry

Acknowledging your anger is the first step in managing it effectively. Pay attention to your body’s signals and recognize when you are starting to feel overwhelmed by anger.

‍

2. Take Time to Ask Yourself What You Want and Need

Before reacting, pause and reflect on what you truly need or want in the situation. This moment of introspection can help you respond more thoughtfully.

‍

3. Count to 10 or 100 if You Need To. Take Some Deep Breaths

Taking deep breaths and counting can help calm your mind and body, giving you a moment to regain control over your emotions.

‍

4. Do an Angry Dance in Your Living Room

Physical movement can be a great way to release pent-up energy. Let yourself dance out your anger in the privacy of your living room.

‍

5. Go to the Driving Range and Hit a Bucket of Balls

Engage in a physical activity that allows you to channel your anger constructively. Hitting a bucket of balls at the driving range, or playing a sport like basketball or soccer, can help you burn off some of that angry energy.

‍

6. Throw Ice at a Tree or a Wall

Throwing ice can be a symbolic way to shatter your anger. Watch as it breaks apart, and imagine your anger dissipating with it.

‍

7. Throw Rocks in a River or Body of Water

Similarly, throwing rocks into water can be a therapeutic way to release anger. Each splash can represent letting go of some of the weight you’re carrying.

‍

8. Take a Shower to Calm Down and Feel the Water Washing Your Anger Away

A warm shower can be incredibly calming. Imagine the water washing away your anger, leaving you feeling refreshed and more centered.

‍

9. Decide to Discuss What You Are Angry At, at a Later Time or Date

If you’re too angry to have a constructive conversation, it’s okay to postpone it. Give yourself time to cool off before addressing the issue.

‍

10. Pound on a Pillow or Mattress

Physical release can be essential in dealing with anger. Pounding on a pillow or mattress can provide that outlet without causing harm.

‍

11. Play Angry Notes on the Piano

Music can be a powerful way to express emotions. Let your anger flow through your fingers as you play the piano or another instrument.

‍

12. Rip Up a Telephone Book, Magazine, or Newspaper

Tearing something apart can feel cathartic when you’re angry. A telephone book, magazine, or newspaper can all be good options.

‍

13. Use Humor to Dissipate Your Anger

Laughter can be a great way to defuse anger. Watch something funny or try to find humor in the situation to lighten your mood.

‍

14. Write Out Your Anger

Writing can be a therapeutic way to process your emotions. Put your thoughts and feelings down on paper to help work through your anger.

‍

15. Take a Time Out for an Hour and Then Return and See if You Are Able to Work Out What Is Making You So Angry

Taking a break can give you the distance you need to gain perspective. After an hour, you may find that your anger has lessened and you’re better able to address the issue.

‍

16. Pull Weeds!

Gardening can be a surprisingly effective way to channel your anger. Pulling weeds requires physical effort and can also be a productive way to vent your frustration.

‍

17. Exercise Hard and Lift Weights. Be Careful Not to Overdo Your Routines

Exercise is one of the best ways to release anger. Whether it’s lifting weights, running, or another form of exercise, make sure you do it safely and don’t overexert yourself.

‍

18. Stomp Around Your Yard and Jump in Puddles of Water

Sometimes, a little bit of childlike behavior can be just what you need. Stomping around and jumping in puddles can help you feel more grounded.

‍

19. Take a Towel and Roll It Up and Beat on the Bathtub

Using a towel to hit a solid surface like a bathtub can be another way to physically express your anger without causing damage.

‍

20. Decide if It’s Worth Your Anger

Finally, consider whether the situation is worth your anger. Sometimes, it’s best to let go and focus your energy on something more positive.

‍

Anger is a real and significant part of grief, especially for those who have been affected by the loss and challenges associated with pediatric cancer. At the Austin Hatcher Foundation, we encourage you to pay close attention to what you need in these moments. Let others support you if you’re willing to be vulnerable and ask for help. Remember, you don’t have to go through this alone.

For more resources and support, visit www.HatcherFoundation.org.

‍

About the Austin Hatcher Foundation for Pediatric Cancer
The Austin Hatcher Foundation for Pediatric Cancer is a nonprofit organization dedicated to providing a lifetime of free essential services to children and families affected by pediatric cancer. Through its various programs, the Foundation offers support, education, and hope to children battling cancer and their families, helping them navigate the challenges of diagnosis, treatment, and survivorship. For more information about the organization, visit www.HatcherFoundation.org.

Call/Text: 423-243-3471

Email: info@hatcherfoundation.org

‍